Jabootu's Bad Movie Dimension

Nation of Jabootu

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Nation of Jabootu

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" Devoted to the savoring of films at the very bottom of the Cinematic Bell Curve! "

Jabootu is not dead!

Now posting at the new...

http://www.jabootu.net

If you didn't know about the new site and have been longing for your Jabootu fix, come to the new site and get addicted all over again!


Billions served

 


 


An awful prophecy
once warned that
“Someday, your
Prince will come.”

Tragically, that
day has arrived.
 

 However, at times
a New Year also
brings a fresh start.



We've got
one of
those, too.


 

 


 

Only -2741 days 'til B-Fest 2007!!!

Take Your Money...  

Please!!

Buy
JabootuJunk!!
(Because, really, who doesn't 
desperately need another mug, 
T-Shirt or baseball cap?)

The Critics are wild about Jabootu!!

"God, what a moron --the review (or hatchet job) reminds me of Maugham's sneering at Amis!!"
--  Correspondent "Mimus," 
referring to Ken and his Candy review; the alt.alien.vampire.flonk.flonk.flonk usenet group

"...bitter and pedantic!!"
-- Michael Rosen-Molina;
UCLA Daily Bruin On-Line

(Note:  Exclamation points may have been added for emphasis' sake.)

 

 

 

    

Y 9 J...   H E A D I N G   I N T O   O U R   N I N T H   Y E A R!!!    9/18/06

01/01/07

In Reviews...

04/30/06
"I think that I shall never see,
something as silly as a rubber killer tree..."
    Our stalwart military stands up against to the titular potted perils in the '60s sci-fi classic The Navy vs. the Night Monsters, courtesy of Jabootu Sponsor Eric Balzer.

03/31/06
The patronage period of Henry Brennan ends with the appearance of
his official Sponsor's Pick, Billy Jack Goes to Washington.  It's my last Tom Loughlin movie!  Wheee! 

01/15/06
B-Masters Roundtable time, and Ken gets his barf bag out as the crew examines the films outlawed in Britain in the early '80s as Video Nasties.  See Ken take refuge in the list's silliest time period, The Night of the Bloody Apes.

08/14/05
Sand, shore and silly sea creatures are the fare of the day
when Ken joins the B-Masters for
some summer fun, only to fall prey to The Horror of Party Beach.
 

 

 

What's New at B-Notes

1/21/2003
Apostic returned from oblivion.  Enjoy Nukie (1993) in B-Notes.

 

In Nuggets...

09/24/06
Taking leave of their senses, Pam & Steve of Gangrene Widescreen invite Ken to join our forces and wield our broadswords and bon mots against Ator, the Fighting Eagle.

06/11/06
There no escaping the end of the world, especially if you enjoy bad television mini-series.  This time Kim Delaney and her posse are back as they attempt to survive a 10.5 Apocalypse.

05/21/06
The Master of Mediocre Menace
serves up another serving of narrative
road kill, when a pompous surgeon sees several pointlessly naked women before confronting his destiny Face to Face.

04/25/06
It's time to watch our stories again, as super-ape Grodd and his compadres in the Legion of Doom oppose the Justice League while seeking Revenge on Gorilla City.

04/16/06  Blind Dead, German crime, superheroes and bad musical comedy are all featured in the April 2006 issue of Video Cheese.

07/31/05
We live!  And more exciting, it's the return of Video Cheese.  Action, romance, and a report of the first ever amazing T-Fest!!

 

Miscellany...

Jabootu is so big on anonymity, he's created a Privacy Statement for his minions.


It is your duty to stay in tune with B-Notes.

The best of the worst... keep up with the latest antics of the entertainer class in Hollywood News

Proud Recipient

In Events...

Don't miss the action... Only -2741 days 'til B-Fest 2007!!! Details will be in Events when we have them, but you might want to mark your calendars now...

 

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Really, what is this?

"What is this page all about?",   you ask?  ...This site is devoted to the savoring of films at the very bottom of the Cinematic Bell Curve.  No, you won't find Batman and Robin, nor Armageddon massacred within these pages.  That would be Mr. Cranky's job, and you will find many other sites in our links list which contain fine carvings of un-craftsmanlike conduct in blockbuster films. 

Those films, however, escaped the Jabootu dimension by sheer virtue of their mediocrity; one side-by-side viewing of Godzilla (AKA Dean-zilla) next to, perhaps The Giant Claw, should be sufficient to illustrate the distinction we are seeking.

Which is not to say that box-office success (or near-success) necessarily disqualifies a film from participation in the Jabootu Dimension.  Why, Jabootu himself is the spawn of a critically acclaimed but quite differently-clued specimen of filmmaking acumen.  Seek Jabootu in these pages, and you're sure to find him (quiet in the studio, please...).  Which begs the question...

Who is Jabootu?

Ah, yes... "Who is Jabootu?", you wish to know. ...Read on, fearless soul!  Jabootu has come to be known as the muse of Bad Movie creativity.  Without the assistance of Jabootu's creative powers, the likes of Ed Wood, Chesty Morgan, The Amazing Criswell, and their ilk would have vanished into the anonymous mass of mediocrity, virtually unknown for their Greatness in Awfuldom as they are today.  Those who dared make deals with Jabootu, however, have been immortalized for all eternity in the Dimension of Great Badness... the Jabootu Dimension!





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Credits:
Concept and content by Mr. Kenneth Richard Begg (ken@jabootu.com)
Additional content by Jason MacIsaac and Douglas Milroy
Page layout and graphics by Paul Clayton Smith
(paul@jabootu.com)

Concept and content by Mr. Kenneth Richard Begg Page layout and graphics by Paul Clayton Smith

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