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Ericb
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
USA
648 Posts |
 Posted - 10/13/2009 : 07:24:10 AM
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Here are some quotes I came across on the internet from the new Dan Brown novel that I found amusing:
“Wearing only a silken loincloth wrapped around his buttocks and neutered sex organ, Mal’akh began his preparations.”
“Hanging beneath the archway, his massive sex organ bore the tattooed symbols of his destiny. In another life, this heavy shaft of flesh had been his source of carnal pleasure. But no longer.”
“Chief Anderson wondered when this night would end. A severed hand in my Rotunda? A death shrine in my basement? Bizarre engravings on a stone pyramid? Somehow, the Redskins game no longer felt significant.”
“Then, like an oncoming truck, it hit her.” [describing a character's epiphany]
“...cruised the deep waters of the C.I.A. like a leviathan who surfaced only to devour its prey.”
“The revelation crashed over Langdon like a wave.”
“His head ached now, a roiling torrent of interconnected thoughts.”
"I used to be With IT. But then they changed what IT was. Now what I'm with isn't IT, and what's IT seems scary and wierd. It'll happen to YOU!" - Grandpa Simpson
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Neville
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Spain
1590 Posts |
Posted - 10/13/2009 : 3:10:34 PM
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I can understand the first lines. Seriously, nothing like some eroticism to se help sell bad literature. Ken Follett has been doing it for ages. But now, the "epiphany" moments are some serious bad writing.
I've read over the years a few of Brown's novels, and I consider him one of the worst best-seller authors I've ever read. And I particularly hate that habit of his of having chapters of only a few pages ending with a cliffhanger. Does he really think we readers have such short attention spans? |
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Asta Kask
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Sweden
263 Posts |
Posted - 10/14/2009 : 03:32:20 AM
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You buy his books, so how long attention span can you have?
- Who is John Galt? - |
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Neville
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Spain
1590 Posts |
Posted - 10/14/2009 : 08:03:42 AM
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| Average, I guess. Enough to remember the plot after reading three pages. Didn't buy his stuff, however, I borrowed from friends more gullible than I am. |
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niccolom
Preeminent Apostolic Prelate of the Discipleship of Jabootu
Canada
118 Posts |
Posted - 10/15/2009 : 6:08:49 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Ericb
Here are some quotes I came across on the internet from the new Dan Brown novel that I found amusing:
“Wearing only a silken loincloth wrapped around his buttocks and neutered sex organ, Mal’akh began his preparations.”
“Hanging beneath the archway, his massive sex organ bore the tattooed symbols of his destiny. In another life, this heavy shaft of flesh had been his source of carnal pleasure. But no longer.”
Please tell me you're kidding? These quotes are actually from the new Dan Brown novel that Macleans* magazine featured on its front page as the next Canadian bestseller? And what the heck is a "neutered sex organ?" Does that mean he was been castrated? Or does it just mean that he had his tubes were "snipped" so he can't have any kids?
On second thought, may be I don't want to know. Diffidently won't be buying that novel.
I read the Da Vinci Code and I have some diffident thoughts on the plot which I won't go into because I don't want to get us all sued, but having read Holy Blood, Holy Grail I was really surprised when the plagiarism law suit against him was thrown out of the British court. I don't think he would have been so lucky on this side of the pond.
* Maclean's is Canada's (poor) imitation of Time's magazine.
"When you have to shoot, shoot, don't talk."
Tuco Benedicto Pacifico Juan Maria Ramirez, aka "Tuco," aka "the Rat," aka "Ugly," aka "il Cattivo" |
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BT
Preeminent Apostolic Prelate of the Discipleship of Jabootu
USA
168 Posts |
Posted - 10/16/2009 : 08:35:56 AM
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I'm one of the simpletons who liked Browns earlier novels. I realized they weren't great literature by any means, but I enjoyed their brisk pace, at least somewhat clever puzzles, and that they had some interesting ideas.
I read the new one (got it from the library, so no, I didn't pay for it), and was sort of surprised how bad it was. On the surface, the pace seemed just as quick, but in reality I had no problem putting it down when my train rides were over. More glaringly, the "twists" were about as obvious as could be. In fact, the main twist is set up fairly early in the book, and not only did I figure it out as I was reading it, but it seemed so obvious that by the time the twist was sprung at the end, I'd forgotten it was supposed to be a surprise.
To add to all this, the villain's actions in many cases are inexplicable (especially a "Batman" style trap with a built in escape clause), and after finishing the book, I still am not entirely certain what "secret" was in danger of being exposed.
So, no, I don't recommend it to anyone, especially those of you who didn't like Brown to begin with.
(PS, the villain had been castrated, leaving his massive sex organ neutered. Never thought I'd type that line on a Jabootu board). |
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Neville
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Spain
1590 Posts |
Posted - 10/16/2009 : 1:59:21 PM
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| To be fair, the villains in both The Da Vinci code and Angels and demons were quite laughable as well. A habit wearing albino killing people here and there and not being identified? Plus he's wearing cilice? Is that supposed to make him more lethal? And the über-assassin in A & D couldn't be that good if an academic like Langdon could beat him in a hand to hand fight. |
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