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cschack
Preeminent Apostolic Prelate of the Discipleship of Jabootu
Norway
124 Posts |
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Paul LoJ
Supreme Potentate
USA
420 Posts |
 Posted - 10/10/2005 : 08:51:12 AM
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"100% Pure Steven Seagal Juice"?(!)
I'm speechless...
"...You know perfectly well what is the matter with you. You have known it for years, though you have fought against the knowledge. You are mentally deranged." |
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Bobby-G
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
USA
904 Posts |
Posted - 10/10/2005 : 12:32:07 PM
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Hmmmmm - "Designed for...any extreme situation requiring ultimate energy"; I've got to go mow the lawn -- does that count?
Rob
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GalahadPC
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
USA
380 Posts |
Posted - 10/10/2005 : 3:00:59 PM
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Besides the part where he's described as an "herbal specialist" (which requires no credentials whatsoever) and "Master sensei" (redundant), I especially loved this part:
"Designed for intense mortal combat or any extreme situation requiring ultimate energy"
Now, if I was planning on mortal combat in the near future, or had mortal combat imposed on me on a routine basis, I think instead of slamming down a can of energy juice, I'd just get a gun and learn how to use it.
Also, 1.9 servings per can? What the hell? |
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thepanteduffin
Diocesan Ecclesiarch of the Sacred Order of Jabootu
Canada
74 Posts |
Posted - 10/10/2005 : 3:21:11 PM
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Can my can of Steven Seagal Lightning Bolt beat up my bottle of Trump Ice?
"You weren't being thick after all - you were showing moral fiber! "
- Ronald Weasley |
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Juniper
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
616 Posts |
Posted - 10/10/2005 : 5:40:15 PM
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So if I drink it I'll have a visions of an old terribly embarassed looking eskimo woman telling me I'm an avatar of nature, and Michael Caine will try to kill me? I'll pass thank you.
-Juniper "already in enough trouble from Coke Zero"
"The Devil Made this Movie for You!" |
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Prankster
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Canada
727 Posts |
Posted - 10/11/2005 : 12:31:20 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Bobby-G
Hmmmmm - "Designed for...any extreme situation requiring ultimate energy"; I've got to go mow the lawn -- does that count?
No, that's penultimate at best.
quote:
Originally posted by thepanteduffin
Can my can of Steven Seagal Lightning Bolt beat up my bottle of Trump Ice?
Its stunt double can.
And so on.
---
Check out my online comics at [URL]http://www.phantasmictales.com[/URL]! |
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AnnGora
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
252 Posts |
Posted - 10/11/2005 : 11:19:03 AM
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I'll bet he can't do this! (touching nose with tip of tongue)
She was bred in old Kentucky, but she's just a crumb up here. |
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MikeC
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
USA
749 Posts |
Posted - 10/11/2005 : 1:44:28 PM
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The question really is:
Is it Virgin Steven Seagal juice, derived from
the first pressing?
Or is it Extra Virgin, from the 2nd?
MikeC, In either case: EUUUUUUWWWWW!!!!!! |
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hbrennan
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Philippines
1455 Posts |
Posted - 10/11/2005 : 1:46:47 PM
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quote:
AnnGora wrote: I'll bet he can't do this! (touching nose with tip of tongue)
I'm afraid that information is classified (from his "CIA background")
"...yet it hadn't destroyed his brain."
re: Charles "The Butcher" Benton (1956)
http://henrybrennan.blogspot.com/ |
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KurtVon
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
USA
387 Posts |
Posted - 10/11/2005 : 2:30:59 PM
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Funny story: A friend of mine goes to a party and is introduced to the georgeous woman. They shake hands and she says, obviously drunk, "If you can touch your nose with your tongue, I'm going home with you tonight." He politely laughs and walks over to the drink table, serruptitiously attempting to touch his nose with his tongue (no harm in trying). When he gets to the drink table he looks up and there are a whole bunch of guys all trying the same thing.
Ah, we are so easliy manipulated.
Back to Steven Seagal: Even if he can, would anyone care?
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Juniper
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
616 Posts |
Posted - 10/11/2005 : 3:56:58 PM
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Hell if he can't trot out even just one other facial expression I'll buy a case of the stuff.
"The Devil Made this Movie for You!" |
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ELOrocks17
Preeminent Apostolic Prelate of the Discipleship of Jabootu
USA
131 Posts |
Posted - 10/11/2005 : 4:49:16 PM
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| Hell, the Shipping alone costs over $7 for 1 bottle. |
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Juniper
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
616 Posts |
Posted - 10/11/2005 : 4:55:32 PM
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Well Girdles and hair plugs don't pay for themselves you know.
"The Devil Made this Movie for You!" |
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thepanteduffin
Diocesan Ecclesiarch of the Sacred Order of Jabootu
Canada
74 Posts |
Posted - 10/11/2005 : 7:16:53 PM
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*thepantedpuffin looks at the drink and nods in adversarial respect*
This drink's good!
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Neville
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Spain
1590 Posts |
Posted - 10/12/2005 : 05:09:21 AM
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| The only way this could help in a mortal combat situation is if you could trick your opponent into drinking it. |
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