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Ken HPoJ
Supreme Potentate
USA
1530 Posts |
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Neville
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Spain
1590 Posts |
 Posted - 01/12/2006 : 3:58:55 PM
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Wow. I'm impressed. Seriously. If I were you I would have saved my ten bucks and waited 'til the DVD or TV screening. By then, hopefully, the whole Uwe Boll affair would have become more clear, and we could try to have a more global view on Boll, why he does crappy movies on purpose (I refuse to believe anybody can be that bad and still get work, although your apretiation of Billy Zane's acting seems to suggest you may disagree on that), and if that rumour about the german tax laws is true.
Anyway, it's a very descriptive article and I can nothing to agree on some of your appreciations on how some badly digested cliches -unnecesary fighting scenes, rushed camerawork- are ruining many current movies.
Just one note: You mention that the film is bad, but not in the funny way. Maybe you picked the wrong Uwe Boll film. Check this link out, the review is in Spanish, but the animated GIFs are quite descriptive on why it sucks that much:
http://www.cinecutre.com/Criticas/HouseDead.htm |
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Ken HPoJ
Supreme Potentate
USA
1530 Posts |
Posted - 01/12/2006 : 4:20:11 PM
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Actually, Joe works for the theater chain, so we got in for 'free.'
And the movie was intermittedly funny, but not like The Swarm or anything.
PEGGY: I don't see how having a girl on the team would ruin it. Did a woman judge ruin the Supreme Court?
HANK: Yes, and that woman's name was Earl Warren.
--King of the Hill |
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Neville
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Spain
1590 Posts |
Posted - 01/12/2006 : 4:34:31 PM
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Oh. Good for you, then. Can't imagine how bad those people who payed for their tickets are feeling now.
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TheFoywonder
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
USA
833 Posts |
Posted - 01/12/2006 : 10:02:08 PM
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What if you used a theater gift card like I did? Should I feel bad for wasting credit on the film?
And I assume you heard about this:
quote:
A projectionist from UltraStar Cinemas has revealed to Shacknews a rather huge error made with the distribution of Uwe Boll's latest cinematic endeavor, the BloodRayne adaptation featuring such well-regarded thespians as Ben Kingsley and Michael Madsen. The UltraStar employee explained that when he got into work last week, he noticed that the theater had received a copy of BloodRayne. This seemed odd because his particular theater generally shows films aimed more at the arthouse set. "I didn't want to build this and put it in my theater," he said, so he checked up with UltraStar higher-ups. It turns out that a computer error resulted in the print being sent to 5,500 more theaters nationwide than was intended. "The computer that placed the order, instead of selecting just the correct theatres, it also selected 5,500 additional theaters, so they made that many extra copies." Whoops.
I asked how much each print costs, and he said that in total, it costs about $5,000 to have each set of reels delivered to a theater, meaning that as a very rough estimate the total costs incurred may be upwards of $27 million. "And that's 27 million that didn't go into production, didn't go into marketing, it's just expenditure that's sitting there," he said. "I mean, I know Ben Kingsley was in Ghandi, but nobody gets to just throw away that much money for nothing."
The situation is exacerbated by the fact that, according to Variety, the film is only showing on 985 screens, just over half of the original target of 1,900--and that's separate from the thousands of accidental extra copies. Now, the film is already millions in the hole and it earned only $1.2 million during its opening weekend, failing to place it in the top ten. Uwe Boll has had a lot of second chances, but might this spell the beginning of the end for the self-described misunderstood director?
Now Playing in Foyeurism at Schlocktoberfest.Com:
ATTACK OF THE 50 FOOT OAK RIDGE BOY - Foy unleashes Yeti, Giant of the 20th Century & his 2005 movie recap
Plus: B-WARE THE BLOG is alive at http://www.livejournal.com/users/foywonder |
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UnknownSubject
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Australia
212 Posts |
Posted - 01/12/2006 : 10:58:08 PM
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I'd like to point out that "Bloodrayne" has very little resemblance to the video game of the same name. In the game, Bloodrayne takes on Nazi occultists in WWII. She does work for Brimstone (I think), but they barely appear in the game.
Spandex Cinema
http://sc.thebeholder.org
Latest Review - December is Bibleman-o-rama Month thanks to Heckler King! |
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Capt. Nemo
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
630 Posts |
Posted - 01/13/2006 : 12:24:29 AM
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Go to the bottom of the screen of this link.
[url="http://www.kinopremiery.cz/trailery/245/index.htm"]Uwe Boll's next abomination: In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale[/url] |
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Asta Kask
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Sweden
263 Posts |
Posted - 01/13/2006 : 03:50:53 AM
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If they die from water, what do they do when it rains? And blood is about 90% water, so...bah! I'm thinking more about this than the director did.
- Who is John Galt? - |
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BradH812
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
USA
1294 Posts |
Posted - 01/13/2006 : 06:46:04 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Asta Kask
If they die from water, what do they do when it rains? And blood is about 90% water, so...bah! I'm thinking more about this than the director did.
- Who is John Galt? -
That allergic-to-water thing was in the game. It was a big problem there, as well; I kept wondering, "How do they bathe?" They take it back in time 200 years and they keep a dumb detail like that in. My brain hurts! |
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Neville
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Spain
1590 Posts |
Posted - 01/13/2006 : 2:47:46 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Capt. Nemo
Go to the bottom of the screen of this link.
[url="http://www.kinopremiery.cz/trailery/245/index.htm"]Uwe Boll's next abomination: In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale[/url]
I swear to Jabootu, when I've seen Ray Liotta in menacing pose, all dressed with medieval clothes but with his usual hair style and chewing scenario like he's never done before, I've though of the scene of "The Cable Guy" where Jim Carrey fights Matthew Broderick at the arena of a Medieval Theme restaurant. |
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BradH812
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
USA
1294 Posts |
Posted - 01/13/2006 : 7:26:48 PM
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One thing I'd like to know is, Uwe Boll's name isn't a secret anymore. So why in God's name are any of these actors signing up for this crap?! Can they really be THAT far behind on their rent?
The only explanation I can think of is, they signed on before people really know what a schlockmeister this guy was. Now that word is out, I think Uwe's career is gonna go ka-blooey. (Oh, my name puns are s-o-o-o-o funny!) |
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GalahadPC
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
USA
380 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2006 : 01:07:07 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by BradH812
quote:
Originally posted by Asta Kask
If they die from water, what do they do when it rains? And blood is about 90% water, so...bah! I'm thinking more about this than the director did.
- Who is John Galt? -
That allergic-to-water thing was in the game. It was a big problem there, as well; I kept wondering, "How do they bathe?" They take it back in time 200 years and they keep a dumb detail like that in. My brain hurts!
Wow... movie monsters that can actually be gunned down by Super Soakers. Wow...
Meanwhile, I couldn't help but notice this brief reference in Ken's blog:
quote:
Imagine a really cheap syndicated show, like perhaps the old Mortal Kombat TV series
There was actually an MK television series?! Why am I just now hearing of this? |
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twitterpate
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Canada
1026 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2006 : 4:55:14 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by BradH812
One thing I'd like to know is, Uwe Boll's name isn't a secret anymore. So why in God's name are any of these actors signing up for this crap?! Can they really be THAT far behind on their rent?
The only explanation I can think of is, they signed on before people really know what a schlockmeister this guy was....
Well, his movies seem to be, if not Waterworld expensive, at least well budgeted. And certainly I've never heard the slightest suggestion (other than by the Master himself) that the money showed up on screen in the production values. So, I can only imagine a lot of it went to give a number of genuinely talented actors a secure retirement, or at least the ability to get really choosy about their roles for the next, say, 10 years.
At least Boll has conclusively settled for us the age-old question, do good actors really NEED good directors, or can they rise above anything that incompetent hacks throw at them. |
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Prankster
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Canada
727 Posts |
Posted - 01/17/2006 : 02:01:12 AM
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...And I'm assuming you're coming down on the side of "no"?
As I said in the blog reply, I found "Underworld" to be a highly entertaining bad movie, but others may simply find it annoying.
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Check out my online comics at [URL]http://www.phantasmictales.com[/URL]! |
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twitterpate
Holy Cardinal and Five Star General of the Righteous Knighthood of Jabootu
Canada
1026 Posts |
Posted - 01/17/2006 : 1:21:47 PM
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Well, he's mowed down some pretty impressive thespians - I've yet to read in any reviews "The movie sucked, but Actor X was his/her usual brilliant self".
BTW, I agree with you about Underworld. It was ridiculous, but entertainingly so. The sad thing is, based on the plot description, Bloodrayne could have been much the same. |
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